Classic Horror Comedy Horror

CLASSIC HORROR -- The Granny

Friday, July 05, 2013Real Queen of Horror



The Granny was directed by Luca Bercovici and released in 1995. With the title of the film, you should know what you're getting into. The film opens to a medieval exorcism involving a Father and Daughter. As expected, death makes its appearance in this situation. The daughter quickly manages to wrap her legs around her Father's head, holding him in a leg lock as she squeals, "Lick me, lick me down there! I have no teeth down there!" This awesome line partnered music that could have come from a Pee Wee Herman movie. And that, ladies and gentlemen, prepares you for The Granny.

Anastasia "Granny" Gargoli, played by Stella Stevens, is the rich and powerful matriarch of the Gargoli family. Apart from being a huge wrestling fan, Granny has a problem! She realizes her waning mortality, but that's the least of her troubles as this Thanksgiving Day permits the arrival of relatives. We are all natives to the feelings of being around family we dislike. Whelp, in Granny's case, she is completely hated by all of her selfish, money hungry relatives except for her granddaughter, Kelly.

Kelly is the only member in the family who genuinely cares for her Granny and takes care of her all year round. But on this particular day, the other relatives have other desires than the well-being of their dear Granny. They strategize to kill her in anticipation of obtaining their inheritance. Unfortunately, Granny invites the priest from the beginning of the movie and is given the "Qui Chon" magical potion that may make her immortal.

There are three simple rules that the priest gives Granny to follow:

1. The elixir must never be touched by sunlight.
2. Make peace with your family through a cleansing ritual.
3. After taking the potion, you must stay out of the sunlight.

But Granny doesn't follow the directions, laying the foundation for the awesome horror that happens!



I'll stop there to refrain from giving spoilers! Just know, blood and guts flow freely throughout this film! As much as I am a huge fan of blood and gore, this film can be extremely out there at times; its very vile. For example, there's a fur scarf that bites a woman to death, a head is chopped off by scissors, someone's penis is severed into a relative's hands and so much more...It's INSANE!

The director, Luca Bercovici, plays the priest and has a favorite word he uses about two thousand times. I wonder about Mr. Bercovici...like if he fantasizes about incest because this film is full of incest.

Although it's pure ridiculous, disgusting and everything gross...I love it! It's definitely a hidden gem. Yes, it lacked a big budget, but it makes up with such awesome and unique camera work. It definitely caught me off guard, but the 90s, cheese-fest feel is what makes the film great! So, if you're looking for a good dose of sleaze and campy-humor mixed with horror, give "The Granny" a try!


I give it 3 out of 5 queen skulls!

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5 comments

  1. Wowwww.Sound good, the capas you post screams "im a friday night movie" will check it. Nice review

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  2. Yes! This one was definitely a howl-worthy keeper, with all manner of madness from opening bell to closing. One correction, though: "Anastasia Gargoli" isn't the name of the actress who plays the title character--that is, rather, the granny character's real name in the movie. The role is essayed by long-time exploitation hand Stella Stevens, who, of course, dives into it with both feet.

    Shannon Whirry plays her doting granddaughter. At the time this was released, Shannon was sort of the queen of late night cable, one of the biggest stars of the softcore thriller cycle of the '90s. One of the running gags of the movie is that Granny and the other characters--who are all as unappealing as it gets--consider her the ugly duckling of the family, and lament how she'll probably never be able to get herself a man (whereas Shannon is more akin to a goddess than a mere mortal).

    I haven't seen this one in a long time. It's just as insane as you say, though, and, for better or worse, leaves a strong impression. Good review.

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  3. Oh hell, this movie sounds awful. I'll probably give it a try since it seems like it's just as cheesy as the last two movies I watched from Charles Band.

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  4. Hey!

    Did you see this?

    http://movies.yahoo.com/blogs/movie-talk/don-t-forget-chucky-curse-chucky-trailer-resurrects-173924533.html

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  5. I'm glad to see this movie getting some love, it's one of my favorites. I just can't understand why it's never been released on DVD or Blu-ray. It's got cult classic written all over it!

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